I always thought you'd be by my side

Me Now: How come u didn't go to the Purple Rain tour when you could have?

Me Then: I liked him, but I had to spend my money wisely--on L'Oreal eye shadow and Duran Duran import 12-inches.

Me Now: Gah---gackkk--ah. DUMMY!You liked Purple Rain...you liked it a LOT.

Me Then: Yeah, but I didn't buy it. Taped it off the radio...

Me Now: One lousy dime!!

Me Then: But none of my friends were going. I think. No, they weren't.

Me Now: You couldn't find a way to go?? I mean, you had to figure it out sometime. How else would you finally see U2 for the 45 (50?) dollars no one else was gonna pay to go with you?

Me Then: Yeah, but the concert was on a Saturday, and we had a speech tournament that day. We had to have. Or I had to work (and then go directly to Record Bar and buy another 12-inch).

Me Now: Just...just watch this:



Me Then: Goddamn.

Me Now: GODDAMN.

I'm so glad that I found someone to believe in again

Happy birthday. We need you, always.

...since you took your love away

This is not a radio. But this jukebox is participating.


Mary J. Blige & Prince - Nothing Compares 2 U... by FerrellSouza

Just tell the D.J. to play your favorite tune

I don't remember everything about the two "Welcome 2 Chicago" Prince shows that I witnessed in 2012 at the United Center.

But I do remember a moment of anticipation, standing in line at one of the fancypants bars on the upper concourse, listening to the preshow playlist, and letting this groove get me to move:



I like to think, now, with everything that's changed so drastically in just one noon hour, that he put that preshow list together, selected the songs to feel the spice of life, together, before he brought us together even more.

Honey, I know, I know

I feel every stroke of the guitar solo in “Purple Rain.” I hated to hear those mournful opening chords at the high school dance, it meant stopping the ecstasy of dancing and sitting on the sidelines for eight minutes watching others pair off and shuffle in the dim light. Eight minutes of being alone, watching the couples nestle into each other and trying to understand what that might feel like and wanting it at the same time, and knowing, somehow, that this song itself ached and mourned for that very moment.

Later, after I had learned about those moments, I stood alone, but not alone in the United Center and felt the love for us, all of us, from the small man with great stature. The song became a moment of love, peace and unity that I hadn’t felt and will never feel from another artist again.

I won’t post the song here because that’s one that is still not up.

And you know it already, don’t you.

Love will conquer if you just believe

Haven't been able to do this yet. First was shock, then the wild dancing, then put in about 15 out of the 26 hours of listening to the catalogue via (kind of) Alphabet Street, then more dancing, then foiled attempts at a jukebox wake during sportzpucker playoff season.

This all sounds more flippant than I intend it to. It's hard to process. Nothing lasts, not even him. But he and I remain, every time he turns me on.

It feels insurmountable, this knowing that from here on it's going  letting go, always letting go of things, places and people. The first, easy. The second, can't control. The last, something to cross, again and again.


But it's only mountains...





[9] pRiNcE - "Mountains" by mke-coleman

[two videos, because they are all flooding back, with our tears and many memories]

Maybe that's why you're around.

Spring's arriving, emerging from Bowie-mersion, and finding I'm sort of becoming addicted to Tusk.



It needs to be mobile--on the iPod.

Time is truly wastin'

"Ernie was taken aback that Ron had uttered 'bullshit.' When asked why he said the word, Ron simply replied, 'because it needed to be said" and "it's what people want to hear.'"

But you're not really here

The way that Karen sings "long ago, and so very far away" pierces my soul, somehow, transcending time and sending me back to the long carpet, record burbling on the stereo. Maybe it's the first song I could grasp as "song." But it's also that the voice, the voice is supernatural, it is the aural explication of yearning. It expresses and explains longing at all the same time.

Those three words immediately push out tears from I-don't-know-where.



I should add that this is what I assume to be one of the rare times Karen is seen playing drums, which was something she loved to do.

Wake me up.

Four years ago today:



Just exactly as I remembered
Every word
Every gesture
I'm a heart in cold ground


RadioHead - the kiNg of limbs - Separator